bemusedlybespectacled:

tkingfisher:

mazikeenmorningstar:

natrashafierce:

natrashafierce:

why does every recipe blog gotta precede each recipe with like, a 3000 word fic about going to the farmer’s market or visiting some place

There could be MadLibs of this.

“Well, it’s [season] time again, which means all the [age group] and [age group] go down to the [place to get food] with [some cloying thought/sensation about how fuckin’ good food often is] in their [body part]. I remember my first time at [food place] when I was a [younger of the two aforementioned age groups] with my [relative who is the older of the two aforementioned age groups]. It was [year], and [historical event that has no real relevance to the story or recipe] was [happening/just happened]. All the [ingrediens] at [food place] were a [adverb] [color], and we all talked like we were in a fucking children’s book. I couldn’t wait to go home with our bags full of [ingredients], and to

the [ingredients] in a [food container]. The smell still reminds me of [relative]’s house! All I ever thought about was food and ingredients, food and ingredients, food and ingredients, food and ingredients, food and ingredients, food and ingredients, food and ingredients, food and”

[picture of a tree]
[picture of a counter with ingredients artfully arranged all over the damn place]
[about three more pictures just like the last one with only slight variations in composition]

[still no recipe]

Insert anecdote about how nuanced and sophisticated your children’s palettes are and how your husband, who only gnaws on the legs of living cows which have been sprayed in ranch dressing, even enjoyed this. 

[photo of the half-eaten dish on a fucking tree stump or something]

[click to next page for recipe]

Somewhere, a tablecloth is in soft focus.

Actual recipe involves three ingredients you have to Google and/or can only get at Whole Foods.