charlubby:

other cursed child bits of wankery that spring to mind:

• how did harry transfigure himself into voldemort. did he have a polyjuice potion on hand? i guess as a member of the ministry it’s plausible but where would he have gotten the dna
• HOW did nobody notice bellatrix’s pregnancy. assuming she and voldy banged as soon as she got out of azkaban, she would’ve been heavily pregnant during hbp, when she’s living at malfoy manor, so wouldn’t draco have noticed?
• also how old is delphie supposed to be. there’s only a three year window where she could’ve been born, which would put her at 16 at the YOUNGEST so why the hell does she have a romance subplot with a 12 year old
• wouldn’t it take a fucking long time to twist a time turner back more than two decades
• where would the rumours of voldemort using a time turner to impregnate astoria (???) even come from when a) scorpius is described as being the spit image of draco and b) pretty sure voldemort would have other pressing matters on his mind if he had his hands on a fucking time turner
• also i thought time turners couldn’t create a new timeline, they just allow you to ensure that what has already happened happens
• honestly why the fuck would jkr decide to go for a time turner plot when it’s just a plothole haven