Things French parents say to their kids

ambrena:

ewnor:

jadisjavaisuncoeur:

nous-les-cancres:

nope-not-true:

When we forget to turn off a light:
C’est pas Versailles ici !
Hey, we’re not in Versailles !

When we stand between them and something they want to see:
Et ton père, il est vitrier ?
Is your father a glazier?

When you are hungry but the dinner is not ready yet
Ben mange ta main et garde l’autre pour demain !
Well, eat your hand and save the other one for tomorrow !

What’s for dinner ?
Des caillous.
Pebbles.

When you lie too obviously :
Et mon cul c’est du poulet.
And my ass is made of chicken.

When you are in a bad mood :
Mange des carottes, ça rend aimable.
Eat some carrots, you’ll be nicer

When you are throwing a tantrum :
Pleure un coup, tu pisseras moins.
Go on and cry, you’ll piss less.

And the world wonders why we are so sassy.

jewist:

the worst is having a dream where someone loves you and you can practically feel them touching you and it feels so real and then you wake up and it’s like the life is being sucked out of you and the happiness just drains out of your body and you feel empty again

villainfetish:

kiwisoap:

Listen I know everyone loves making Chewbacca a dog in modern AUs, but please consider as an alternative: Chewbacca, Han’s extremely hairy foreign friend with an accent so thick that only Han understands what he’s saying. They’ve been friends for years and never explain the circumstances of their meeting. He shows up to every family gathering and no one knows where he lives or where he came from. Everyone just accepts it.

“Where’s he from?”

“France.”

“Okay.”